A Cat Guy and a Weekend

I’m not sure if you’ve noticed but I’m something of a cat guy. Yeh, who knew huh?

Well, while my landlady and also dear friend, Celie, has been enjoying some much needed sun and down time away from the cold and dire “tune in tonight to find out how we will all die” cold weather predictions, I’ve been minding the kit kaboodle.

Now there are, of course, mine. My Bella Girl in her (and my dearly missed Shoes’s) first of my 2 computer chairs right next to me as I type, always, kitten china shop Blink and some warm laundry’s pause, old quirky, fragile girl Mimi (Memes) finding that same warm pause and Cricket the Blind of the wailing meow quietly grabbing a cat nap on a Steve bed.

But there is also a Honey Bob Tail, or “Boo” as I like to call her, the uber cool Lebowski-like dude Bruce and his seeming lazy eye, big boy Buck in his finest of tux, Florida and her perfect orange, Handsome, perfectly named and who’s always a nose to nose swivel head nudge with me on my come homes, Lola of the silent meow, Sharky my assistant chef at dinner time and the aloof, secretive Trucker who just appears. Really, he just appears. No idea from where.

Missing for the moment? Dolly who you can sometimes find in the sink and say “Hello Dolly” with a musical nod, Millie who you can often never find and Cujo who has earned his name but is still, though be wary mere humans, a good boy. Oh, and there is the other Bella, of bird type, who decided to tap tap around on the hardwood and check out the me taking pictures. She is not one to be excluded.

How was your weekend?

Sometimes…We Own Time, If Only For A Moment

Sometimes you just have a night where time it seems to slow down, where it seems to stand still. Now, obviously, that’s not possible, as time doesn’t slow down, it is, after all, time. It marches always at the same clip forward not mindful of or caring for us at all, relentless bastard that it is, but still there are those moments where it really does feel as if it gives us a pause. Like maybe those nights where you dream, vivid, colorful full blown movie-like dreams, and you wake to check the actual here and now time. 4 or so am. You get up to pee and you go back to bed/sleep, jumping right back into that movie of dreams, scene after scene playing out in all it’s down to the last detail glory and you roll over and wake again. It’s now just 4:24. And you’ve lived an entire movie or more it seems, hours upon hours i what feels like real time. You roll back over. This movie of your dreams continues, maybe even to its finale, and the next time you wake it’s only 4:42. Wonderful that way sometimes huh?

That’s the time slow I’ve enjoyed tonight (this morning), though fully awake, in the quiet of a perfect warm colored little lamp lit apartment as I tinker with words while 4 cats sleep undisturbed by my soft foot putzing around this perfect.

When I can spin and roll back in my second computer chair to take a walkaround without waking my Bella laying right next to me in the first, when I can do said soft foot putzing past sleeping cat kitten tornado Blink and she stays put on the futon on a just worn Steve sweatspant, not caring of my movements, not even raising an eye or an ear, when I can I can check an old, fragile, quirky Mimi girl (Memes) on a shelf in my computer desk or a Cricket the Blind leaned up asleep on my pillow on the bed while I do quiet? Yeh, time, it does indeed seem to stand still. I’m good with such a moment. Time? I think I just owned ya…if however briefly.

A Boy And His Cat In A Cone Plastic Hat

Shoes and I getting acquainted

For three plus years now I’ve had this single line rattling round my noggin, bumping into shit. “A Boy And His Cat In A Cone Plastic Hat.” A Dr Seussian type line that has never let me be. I’ve written thousands of words around it in my head over these years as I remember Shoes and the walks he and I would take around the drive/roadway and parking lots that circled our apartment complex during his last month or so. It was a time for me that was as equally heartbreaking as it was wondrous. I know I’ve brought up Shoes often, so much so that it may seem tired, but he was one of those friends that needs be remembered and brought up often for what he was. A reminder of who we are. A reminder of what is/was true. I think, maybe, I’ve finally got this down now. Bear with me.


A Boy And His Cat In A Cone Plastic Hat 

There was a boy and his cat in a cone plastic hat

Who found themselves walking this way and way that
In circles round home on a night by night trip
He talkin’ cat list’nin’
At a calm peaceful clip

You see

The boy’s cat in this cone plastic hat was not well

And the boy he had many long stories to tell
To his dearest of friends of 11 grand years

But trying to do so without shedding his tears

So they walked and he talked on these perfect (s) of nights
Allowing this cat in the cone plastic hat
Some flights
Footed outside
For the first time in his life
A gift from the boy to this cat’s great delight

And the cat in the cone plastic hat listened just right
Though now minus one ear from a Doctor’s need stop
The other had might
Enough to catch stories spun high in the air
By his boy who he followed with great love and great care

Along their way they passed people and pets
Both large and both small
To the cat in the cone plastic hat though
They were all tall
But he came to grow big as they petted and gushed
With attention he loved
As they marveled his gifts to walk with no rush
With his boy who just smiled some big hearty hugs

This cat in the cone plastic hat waited by day
For the sound of boy’s car
To home come from what seemed so
So far
Far away
To make
Way
Stairs
Down,
No dilly
No dally
As time for him now was no longer an ally

You see

The cat in the cone plastic hat knew he hadn’t this time
He wanted their friendship to grow and to shine
But for this shortest of moments
In the grandness of things
They would stride steady together with the greatness of kings

It was stories of boy that were of utmost import
In walks round their round he would offer support
While cat sniffing cat checking
Getting caught in the brush
His cone plastic hat it was flush
Filled with tales flung way far
That dearly so meant
So,
So so much

There was even a day
This cat in the cone plastic hat
Got chance just to play
And to lead while, of course, always knowing the way
Minus his hat
Oh glorious day
Then bringing boy back to that place they called home
Where all with the boy it was always the known

But there were things this cat in the cone plastic hat knew needed be said
Of what would become in his absence of stead
Of what boy would do after the gone
Where time it would shorten but still feel so
Long

The cat in the cone plastic hat knew just what
What knew of just such
What knew sure of be that too long
A day
To help him stay strong
To make it not much
He’d say

Goodbye
He thought
In life’s wonder of walks
This cat who was now at in his cone plastic hat
But remembering time where this wasn’t just that
When play was a shoelace tossed long and just right
For wondrous of times and of silly fun fights
Of a mouse down to chase
Or a titter hand tat
And all while wearing no such special hat

But paw forward he would
This way and way that
His best boy in the world as well as he could
To friends who he knew he should
Surely point true
To others in fur and some so in skin
But still remind them that his name was Shoes

Always Shoes

You see

He resides now in heart held so very so strong
Of a nightstand’s still perch
Sensing short winded nightmares long
So sudden jerks
To come down and so sweetly lay to boy’s left
To calm him to know that all was still well
That there would still be so many more stories to tell
That there will always be some more to be said

Now sleep just go back
“We’re hittin’ the rack”
As you always would say
Ahead of tomorrow’s a brand new grand day
Rest your boy head
The begin has its end but ends beg begin … always
Get some sleep for right now
At least
My dearest of friends

Shoey Nightstand 3

Trump & His Mob: Nothing If Not Unintentionally Funny

One thing I have noted over the last two years of this Presidency, besides of course the clear attempts to undermine our Democracy along with the rule of law, the obvious corruption of Trump’s Administration from the top on down and the unconstitutional practices et al is that somehow Trump, the White House, Press Secretary Hucksterbee, all his congressional sycophants and State News Propagandizing pundits have been able to maintain their unintentional sense of humor, in the face of setbacks, obvious hypocrisy and of course the ONLSAUGHT of lies fact checked on a daily basis. Must give credit where credit is due.

For instance, this morning, on my way in to work, I heard on CBS 880 that the White House says that tonight in his second State of the Union address Trump will try to convey a message of unity. Now ya gotta admit, that’s pretty unintentionally funny huh? I mean, from the campaign through the last two years, Trump has lived by the motto “Us Vs Them…and it’s really bad to be a them.” Being divisive is squarely in Trump’s wheelhouse so to think he’ll try and call for unity amid his expected barrage of lies is quite a stretch and pretty unintentionally funny, especially knowing that no one has bothered to explain to Trump that unity DOESN’T mean blind obeisance.

Earlier this week Hucksterbee said at a meeting of Christian Broadcasters “I think God calls all of us to fill different roles at different times and I think that he wanted Donald Trump to become president, and that’s why he’s there and I think he has done a tremendous job in supporting a lot of the things that people of faith really care about”.

Exactly! Like wanting to protect THEIR “religious liberty” by taking away YOUR rights and passing judgement over everyone else by legislating a cherry-picked Bible in order to send us all backwards even faster than the speed of light…the speed of stupid. Now, other than the rumble you felt under your feet as some of the drafters of the Constitution rolled over in their graves in unison you, in this case as well, gotta admit that Hucksterbee saying Trump was God’s choice is really unintentionally funny especially knowing that if there is truly a god he wouldn’t be that fucking cruel or have such a sadistic sense of humor.

Hucksterbee also went on later to try and explain, YET AGAIN, in that special dismissive & condescendingly disingenuous way of hers, as she follows the propaganda handbook repetition section to the letter, how and why Trump has done more in just two years than any other president in history, something we also hear him try to convince us of ad nauseum. Yeh, some more unintentionally funny shit right there.

And just a couple of days ago Madeleine Westerhout, who is the SAP & Director of Oval Office Operations, whatever that is – correction, we do know what a sap is, especially in this case, said in a tweet bemoaning the leaking of Presidential schedules that show just how ‘hard’ he’s really working that “This POTUS is working harder for the American people than anyone in recent history”. Damn, this whole gang is just a sure fire fucking unintentional laugh riot now wouldn’t you say?

Hannity opened his mouth again. Unintentional laugh riot.

Laura Ingraham tweeted again. Unintentional laugh riot.

Tucker Carlson was undeservedly superior again. Unintentional laugh riot.

Kellyanne exists. Unintentional laugh riot.

We’ll have to wait and see how tonight goes. My guess is that any call for unity will come as more of an accusation against the “them” than as any attempt to even pay lip service to it. It will also come somewhere within a shitload of lies and yet another call to satisfy his ego with a monument to it across the Southern border.

One thing that is guaranteed though, Donald Trump will most assuredly maintain his unintentional sense of humor.

The Trump Treehouse of Tall Stories, Treason and Tyranny – Ep #14: "Red, White & Not Blue Legos"

(The Official Secret Clubhouse of the He-Man Truth & Lego Haters Club)

A bit of a catch up as it has been a while

Players

Ben Carson “Benfred”: Secretary of Housing and Urban Development, something of which he knows nothing. De facto butler, a Batman’s Alfred or “Benfred” here to that guy. Has “bootstraps” tattooed on his ankles as a reminder to those less fortunate.

Donnie: That guy.

Other Players: There have been some and will be others but don’t know yet. Haven’t finished writing this.

//////////////////////////////////

Ben: Are those Legos sir?

Donnie: (sitting cross legged on his faux Oval Office rug … Legos strewn all around him) Yes Ben. Mommy got these for me.

Ben: Mommy?

Donnie: Well, who else would get me Legos? Sheesh.

Ben: You sure?

Donnie: Ummm … (rolling his eyes) … yeah.

Ben: But your mommy is long dead sir. Kellyanne?

Donnie: Ben, you know me and my life too well … I’ll have to note that with the Secret Service by the way … no offense. Can never be too careful.

Ben: None taken sir. Let ’em know I’m Christian, have a flag on my lapel and am only black on the outside … just in case.

Donnie: Will do.

Ben: Did she get you this over sized map of the Southern border as well?

Donnie: She did. Pretty colors. The big one is Texas I think.

Ben: It is.

Donnie: I knew it!

Ben: Your geography is getting better.

Donnie: I know huh? That one is easy though. Texas – big state. Cruz – big lapdog. Wife – big ugly -Texas.

Ben: Well alrighty then. What’s the one next to it Sir?

Donnie: Is it … wait … I got this … is it another State?

Ben: It is. Damn you’re good!

Donnie: (proudly) That. I. Am.

Ben: So what’s with all the Legos by the way?

Donnie: I’m practicing.

Ben: Practicing what sir?

Donnie: Building a wall.

Ben: Surely you have friends already lined up to do that for you?

Donnie: I do … good friends … blindly loyal friends. Ring kiss types with a shitload of secrets that I know down to every detail. Lots of blown sunshine and no-bid back room handshake contracts. Friends that would run through a wall for me … out of fear mostly … but legally of course and without any imaginary women bound with duct tape in the trunks of their cars. But I want to …

Ben: He He. That’s funny sir.

Donnie: Imaginary women bound with duct tape in the trunks of their cars? What the fuck is wrong with you Benfred?

Ben: No … run THROUGH a wall? … and you want to BUILD a wall?

Donnie: What the hell are you talking about Benfred?

Ben: Sorry, it’s just that …

Donnie: They can’t very well run through a wall for me that’s not built yet now can they? That’s why I need the money. Jesus Ben!

Ben: Oh, my bad, you were speaking metaphorically.

Donnie: What?

Ben: You were speaking metaphorically?

Donnie: ?

Ben: It’s when you use a figure of speech in which a word or phrase is applied to an action that is not literally applicable and …

Donnie: ??

Ben: … you Ok sir? Your eyes seem to be glazing over a little and … is that drool?

Donnie: Dammit!

Ben: What sir?

Donnie: There’s blue Legos in here! I specifically asked Mommy in my wish list for only red and white Legos! (starts to well up)

Ben: Hey hey sir, it’s Ok. We can get you another set of Legos with only red and white bricks.

Donnie: (sniffling) You sure?

Ben: Of course.

Donnie: (brightening up a bit) We need a new flag by the way. Do you think you can get a set that includes Lego gun turrets, Lego high powered water hoses and Lego tear gas bombs?

Ben: Ummmm … well … we can certainly try.

Donnie: How about a set with with small Lego tents, Lego cages, Lego barracks. Lego barbed wire fences and Lego children … that’s the cutest thing EVER … small lego children.

Ben: Ummmm …

Donnie: C’mon Ben. I’ve seen all the Lego movie documentaries. They’ve got everything, even Batman. You know I’m thinking that we could set up a Lego Bat signal from the top of the White House, just in case we need him. A guy like that could come in handy and would make for some great PR. I mean, who doesn’t love Batman right? The base would eat it up. Real hero, like me only his feet don’t hurt … though he is a little short … but we can work that out with the right camera angles … and his voice … it’s a bit dramatic … a bit gravelly … not quite the lilting, comforting remedial tenor of mine but I’m sure we could coach him.

Ben: I’ll reach out to his people.

Donnie: You do that. Mommy got me another oversized map by the way, but I don’t understand it.

Ben: It’s all of North America

Donnie: North America?

Ben: It’s the continent we live on.

Donnie: Continental? Does it come with bagels AND cream cheese and free coffee?

Ben: Huh?

Donnie: (looking at it) There’s also a jagged line across the top … wait … is there another border?

Ben: Yeah … north of us sir.

Donnie: But I thought we were the top of the world?

Ben: I know, we are, metaphorically speak…

Donnie: (drool)

Ben: We all think that sir but geographic …

Donnie: (drool twice)

Ben: It’s Canada sir.

Donnie: Who-ada?

Ben: Canada.

Donnie: Hold on. So you’re telling me there’s another border? Shit, I’m gonna need more Legos.

Ben: No, I think you’re good sir.

Donnie: You sure? But it’s another border. Lot’s of lawlessness … new caravans … Chinese not cheap Canadian drugs … violent women and children … terrorists disguised as Mooses and … umm … Canadian gangs being nice…

Ben: Mooses?

Donnie: A group of Moose Ben. Crazed Mooses Ben. Mooses that mean us harm. Damn you’re dim.

Ben: But they’re friendly sir…

Donnie: … don’t some of them speak French?…

Ben: … painfully friendly and accommodating … and they’re mostly white …

Donnie: … freedom fries Benfred … only freedom fries with my breakfast … wait … did you say they’re white?

Ben: Wow, freedom fries … that’s a throwback. Yes they’re mostly white.

Donnie: Well that’s a wrinkle. Maybe I can talk to them then … NO … never mind … they speak French … that’s not American…

Ben: You mean English?

Donnie: No! American! Gotta speak American Benfred. Plus Macron is such a wuss … such a Frenchified wussy wuss … that’s my next next juvenile nickname, “wussy wuss” and demand! A northern wall … across that jagged line thing.

Ben: You mean border?

Donnie: Yes, that.

Ben: We’ll definitely have to get you some more Legos.

Donnie: Yes you will. Now close the door. It’s cold in here. Global warming my ass.

Ben: But scientifically …

Donnie: Benfred!!

Ben: Sorry. Science. My bad.

The Trump Treehouse of Tall Stories, Treason & Tyranny – "It’s A Trump World We’re F****d And We Know It (And I Feel Stein)" – Song

After writing this back in July I finally got a chance to sit down and have a little fun. There is something to be said for such a moment in crazy, upside down, ass backwards days.

Singing leaving a bit to be desired? Check.

Frightening anyone outside my little prod studio door? Check.

Aforementioned fun? Check.

Cheers all,

It’s A Trump World We’re F****d And We Know It (And I Feel Stein)

Not great it starts with a Trumpquake
Snakes breed Snakes, a new filled swamp,
Kanye West should be afraid

Lies form a hurricane, listen to his bluster churn
Trump serves his own needs, asks you of your loyal deeds
Speed them up a notch, ring, blind, bow, kiss, no
Safety net you splatter with the lies of the right,
Downright dumpster fire only help that you can hire must be true
True to sire’s white combat house
Democracy is burning in a hurry but there’s truthies Breathing out real news

Trumpy team believers baffled, truth, sends their world stop
Must send blame…anger…hate

Uh oh, info flow, population, cannot know
What Trump’ll do to lie to self, save himself
Trump serves his own needs watches as a country bleeds
Tells you he’s been God sent a chorus of the right, leans right
You hypocritic Patriotic 5 time dodge
But You’re feelin’ pretty white

It’s a Trump world we’re fucked and we know it
It’s a Trump world we’re dumb and we show it
It’s a Trump world he won and we blew it
And I feel Stein

5 am, Fox and Friends, a Trumpy Street day begins
Lefty burns, return, always loves himself in turn
Throw him in a big parade, bombs bursting, flags wilting
Every truth a danger now, lies must escalate
Build a fire, blame the fire, ride horse, shoot horse
Trample on a flag’s trust use it as a prop must
Wrap himself in fake’s lust
Call the news the bad trust
Repeated calls, chilling calls, calling of their “lies”
He offers no solutions, only state news fake productions and I decline

It’s a Trump world we’re fucked and we know it
It’s a Trump world we’re dumb and we show it
It’s a Trump world he won and we blew it
And I feel Stein …

And I feel Stein

It’s a Trump world we’re plucked and we’re naked
It’s a Trump world we somehow let him take it
It’s a Trump world we’re blind and we hate it
And I’m not mine

In daylight we de-cide whether we should fight or hide
Try to turn the tide,
GIVE THE TRUTH A RIDE,
Martin King, George Carlin, real news, Protest party, bubblegum, apple pie, Grandma, Ellis Island,  Symbiotic, realistic slam dunk humans?
We’re right…Right?

It’s a Trump world we’re fucked and we know it
It’s a Trump world we’re dumb and we show it
It’s a Trump world he won and we blew it
And I feel Stein .

It’s a Trump world we’re fucked and we know it
It’s a Trump world we’re dumb and we show it
It’s a Trump world he won and we blew it
And I feel Stein

It’s a Trump world we’re plucked and we’re naked
It’s a Trump world we somehow let him take it
It’s a Trump world we’re blind and we hate it
And I’m not mine

It’s a Trump world we’re fucked and we know it
(TRUMP SHOULD SPEND SOME TIME IN JAIL)
It’s a Trump world we’re dumb and we show it
(TRUMP SHOULD SPEND SOME TIME IN JAIL)
It’s a Trump world he won and we blew it
(TRUMP SHOULD SPEND SOME TIME IN JAIL)
And I feel Stein ……(fading)

The Trump Treehouse of Tall Stories, Treason & Tyranny – "Lie Together" – Song

And as little ditties about pathological liars and their equally untruthful henchpeople go…

Lie Together

Here come ol’ Ornge top
He come slinkin’ up lie-like
He once boo boo footfall
He fake holy roller
He got lies his base refuse to hear
he prop-a-gandize un-til he’s a bug in their ear
She wear no truth shine
podium barker mob moll
she got indignation at a press corp’s truth call
She say, I tell you, you list-en me
You best be buy my bullshit or it aint comin’ free
Lie together
After me
Hucksterbee
State News corruption
it’s Fox stories or nothin’
They laud faulty numbers
fact check pause they’ll mock ya
we got base who just be-lieve decree
you’re just an en-emy until you see what we see
Lie together
Naturally
Trumpy D
Right!
We tell you our thing
It’s a pretty unreal thing
and we muddy the waters
this swamp’s got no filter
T say one plus one is bill-ions to me
it’s magic math that the base just adores to believe
Lie together
enda days
Trumpy D
Oh…
Lie Together
Yeah
Cry together
Yeah
Blame together
Yeah
Truth whatever
Yeah
Strife together
Yeah!
Divide together
Yeah!!
White forever
Yeah!!!
aaaaahhhhh….

Trump’s Ego Wall: Just Trying To Stay On Page

So let me see if I’ve got this straight.

Despite an only dreamed wall surrounded Mexican mountain of video evidence to the contrary, Trump’s latest spin will now have you believe that he never really said that Mexico would pay for his base red meat ego wall, that he never said that they would just write us a check, though his 2016 campaign website said essentially that, that any reporting of this wealth of video evidence is fake news, that current and former Mexican Presidents of course now, apparently, DIDN’T directly respond to the boast by saying “we won’t pay for your fucking wall” and he says, instead, with his always illusory almost magical Trump math (no one understands finances like Trump does – as all those bankruptcies will attest) that Mexico would somehow be paying for it through the reworked NAFTA deal (the Trump oh so originally and deftly re-named “United States Mexico Canada Agreement”- surely ‘agreement’ being the only difficult word find in the fresh naming – a new deal that really only makes some moderate changes to the original but was more just theater to try and support the illusion that Trump is a master negotiator) and that Mexico, paying for it in this way, would prove out the promise that he now says he never made?

That about it in a nutshell? Just trying to stay on page is all, especially considering the furious and daily onslaught/insult of lies coming from this President and his administration.

For Trump supporters who balk when his detractors call him nothing more than a simple (simple being the operative word) con man?

If you can actually buy this nonsense, this latest bold face lie/autocratic style attempt at revising the past and insisting a new State truth present, then you deserve the snake oil you’ve bought…every last, fake gold gilded made in China case of it.

The Trump Treehouse of Tall Stories, Treason & Tyranny – "I Am The Con Man" – Song

So with a last Friday night’s time on my hands (the cats could wait a few extra hours for dinner I thought – they weren’t happy…but then they were…magic) I finally got a chance to sit down and produce a version of this one, ala “I Am The Walrus.” To anyone who may have chanced by my door? Apologies for what you heard as frightening acapella wailing coming from the other side. Didn’t mean to startle or to worry you. I’m OK.

I Am The Con Man

I am me as I love me and you are me
And we love me together
See how we plumb we’re pigs for the dumb
See dollars run
I’m genius

Sitting on a tax cut
Waiting for some yen to fly
Corporate stock big buy back, stupid farmer loyals
Man you’re all bunch of rubes
You let your Trump grow long

I am the Charlatan
You are the simpletons
I am the Con Man
Goo goo ga-rube

Mr Mrs Congress sitting
Pretty always at my beck and call
See how they buy with a gleam in their eye
See how they buy
My buuuuuulllshit….
They’re buuuuuuying….they’re buuuuuying…I’m lyyyyyyyyyyying!

Yellow ting-ed dollars
Making me a buck or three
Trumpy props’ll bring it home, tradeymarks’ll get it done
Boy I am a wealthy man
I sold the White House down

I am the Charlatan
You are the simpletons
I am the Con Man
Goo goo ga-rube

…Sitting in a rose-ed garden
Waiting chance to lie
And if the lie don’t play
I’ll own my fake by keeping up a perfect face…

I am the Charlatan
You are the simpletons
I am the Con Man
Goo goo ga-rube goo goo goo ga-rube

No one tells me what to do it’s just the base that’s thinking that I’m true
See them form a mob call enemies a slob
See how they cry
For vengeance

No one checking numbers, they take me at my less than word
Money out of pocket, suck it up they musty
Man they are so dumb believe that this is something good

I am the Charlatan
You are the simpletons
I am the Con Man
Goo goo ga-rube goo goo ga-rube, goo goo ga-rube ga goo goo ga-rube ga goo

Last Week In Review

Just a quick breakdown of some lowlights from last week that was.

Man-child threw a hissy after his intended photo-op master negotiator victory went south and instead proudly pronounced his future pride of shutting down the government just before Christmas if he didn’t get his ego wall (stomping feet, pressed fingers, pursed lips, shit thrown).

Kellyanne “Carott Nose” Conway tweeted some words in a vacuum to “The Chief” (not the honorific she surely wanted to make it seem but just an IQ simplistic short for Chief of Staff) General John Kelly and his family…thoughts and prayers that they may be able to somehow, someday, someway find for John some semblance of the white enabled self respect and credibility he held so dear until he tumbled down a deep dark orange rabbit hole where all such things are forever lost.

Mick “Weasel” Mulvaney, three hundred and thirtieth or so on the list, with lips firmly placed, was named acting “The Chief” giving him a chance to finally take a break from both dreaming a fully realized Paul Ryan-esque draconian budget dream and screwing consumer protections.

Interior Secretary Zinke resigned hoping to maybe step out of and ahead of the new swamp he has so enjoyed swimming in like many before him. He’d like to take his expensive door and some of his guns and animal trophies with him if that’s alright.

A child died. Again, with only dreams to blame.

Press Secretary Hucksterbee said she hopes her legacy will be that she has tried to be “transparent and honest” every day (cue canned sitcom laughter)

And, in my favorite moment of the week, Google CEO Sundar Pichai had to explain to Congress why googling “idiot” shows Donald Trump. He somehow restrained himself from responding “Well…duh?”

I know I said “Week in Review” but this might have just been last Tuesday or was it maybe Thursday…I don’t know…so much surreal and stupid shit happens so often that it all melds…hard to tell what constitutes a week these days. Now a new moment of required Zen…(Cheers Jon Stewart)

Kittens in paws running fastly…away from the week in review. (starring Blink)