Karen’s Been Triggered

(to the tune of “Eleanor Rigby” with lyrics by Rick Cross)

Day 6 of a Trump parody tune a day till the election that started this past Sunday.  17 days worth.

Eleanor Rigby is one of my favorite Beatles tunes and, with my initial thought with these parodies to build an “album’s” worth of Beatles songs Eleanor Rigby certainly came to mind as a song subject, but I was afraid I could never hit the “Ahhh’s” so I didn’t even try.

Then my buddy Rick, a buddy of more than 30 years now dating back to our time at WVU when he was the editor of the school newspaper and I was some grad student stranger who approached him with an idea for regular humor column about two off center fictional WVU students and best pals and their adventures on campus. I knew I liked him when he didn’t laugh me out of his office for just walking in off the street to ask for a  column. That column ended up working out pretty well, along with our friendship. 

Anyway, not too long ago he sent me some lyrics he’d written to Eleanor Rigby. They were perfect for our troubled and maddening times.  After giving him the thumbs up at words well done I thought to take a “singing” stab at it, hell he did the hard part right? All I had to do was actually see if I could hit the “Ahhh’s”

(originally posted May 16, 2020)

Note: The sad #’s in this were from the time it was written. They obviously have gotten so much sadder.


Karen’s Been Triggered

Ahhh, look at all the hateful people

Ahhh, look at these ungrateful people


Karen’s been triggered

Pickets outside of a church where a gay wedding’s been

This love is a sin

Waits at her stylist in an angry red face mask that matches her MAGA hat’s tinge

Where to begin?


All the frightened people

Why do they hide their eyes?

All the angry people

While our republic dies


President Donnie

Face slack and ugly and troll-like and ready to sneer

Mindless drones cheer

Look at him preening

Feckless old monster, his mantra is greed, hate and fear

Let’s end his career


All the selfish people

Who teaches them this stuff?

All the stubborn people

How many dead’s enough?


Ahhh, look at all the hateful people

Ahhh, look at these ungrateful people


Karen’s still triggered

Gasping for air on machines in a hospital hall

Why won’t her god call?

President Donnie

Shrugs and ignores digging up 80,000 new graves

It’s money he craves


All the coughing people (Ah, look at all the hateful people)

Was Easter service nice?

All the toxic people (Ah, look at these ungrateful people)

Who’ll make no sacrifice…

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