You know I’ve been doing my ‘parody’ song thing for quite a while now, goin’ on four years I think, some of them have been pretty good and some of them have been absolute shit. But I thought I’d go back today to my first one when I was part of Morning Show. It was about a story of “intelligent design” and the attempt to rename creationism to make it sound more science-like. Don’t get me started on that nonsense. Now the production quality on that one was pretty rough and it was also 17 years ago and I had only been back in radio for a couple of years (after a six year layoff) so my production skills were still a work in progress.
It was to one of my favorite tunes ever, Dire Straits “Industrial Disease”.
Though that initial attempt wasn’t all that good (lyrically it was – it made a point of the dumb) I decided, a number of years later, December of ’19, to update it to the then current state of orange madness we were in.
This new one still made a good point of the dumb.
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There’s warning light’s a flashin’ for a Trumpian reprieve
There was some election riggin’, with some Russians up a sleeve
But Dem’s they did some diggin’ to more meddlin’ goin’ round
And now they’re out to make sure that the walls they come down
—
There’s a meeting in the Congress they’re talkin’ of impeach
One side says yes let’s do it, to the other it’s a reach
But the other side’s brought nothing but debunked conspiracies
Goodness me could this be a Trumpian Disease?
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The President feels justified in talking to the folks
Refusin’ to be quieted and sayin’ it’s no joke
His phone call it was perfect, no ulterior design
He wasn’t tryin’ get help for this new election time
But there’s panic for the Elephant’s these Donkeys all are nuts
The oft repeated tired spin will tell you what is what
That the problem that persists with the Dems all of the time
Is them fighting against great leader’s Trumpian Design
—
State news pundits sure are down with perpetuating lies
Even Moscow Tucker claims he’d be Ok with Russian ties
Of rooting them to victory if that need be the case
Or condemning ol’ Ukraine to help trump D who’s his ace
—
And Trumpy’s lackey lapdogs are now picking up the pace
Of lies needed protect him ‘fore the Senate do they race
Where they’re better able set the Circus Trump he so inclines
To make a victim’s case and prove his Trumpian Design
—
Now William The Low Barr declared
There’s no crimes to be seen here, he’s the President ya know
He’s above law, never fear
Now he hired me to be his hatchet gun and yes man shill
To protect from prosecution while I drink this orange swill
So I openly investigate investigators then
Prove wacky 4 chan theories of disloyal deep state men—
So I can come back with a pre-determined breaking news release
That will prove out the correctness of a Trumpian Disease
—
Now we go down Washington DC where they’re in the muck
Of a swamp that ain’t been drained just deeper & run amok
With all his jailhouse friends most found under a bus
But there’s still some who are waitin’ to hear a pardon’s fuss
While his blood bound GOP who he’s got upon their knees
Say yes sir, no sir, of course sir, anything that you please
We’ll protect you oh great leader from the dreaded Dem blue sleaze
We’ll throw up smoke & mirrors for you on your Trump Trapeze
—
They’ll point out they’re the enemy to keep folks mute & blind
That they should be a’feared of Dems & all those of their kind
That they speak of socialism & the evils of the trees
But you’re the God chose new Messiah heaven gave ya keys
—
Meanwhile God just throws his hands exasperation real
He can’t believe what is unfolding just what is the deal
A party selling country out while building a lie shrine.
To their new Monarch’s Trumpian Design
Yeah, that’s it … a Trumpian Design … Hey producer guy? Yeah, you … can we get the sound of ya know of tanks and a flyover here or somethin’? … the sound of boots too, tall ones, really hard heels … boots doin’ some marchin’ … well crowd noise, good idea … get some crowd noise … big crowd noise though, ‘kay? … then, maybe throw in some of the best words from some of the best speeches … by any President … ever … this is gonna be great!
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