So as I convalesce this now reminder of my creaky back 20 years later and 15 years or so before that, per doctor’s orders, I have been asked to step away from my new girlfriend, Heating Pad, take a time out, and instead embrace Ziploc Bag Of Ice Cubes Wrapped In A Towel.
Tell ya the truth it’s been difficult. Heating Pad and I were getting along so well. I had my cute nickname for her, “Heating Pad”, and she had hers for me ” “, an almost symbiotic unspoken thing.
But I understand. Doc’s orders are doc’s orders.
Though Ziploc Bag of Ice Cubes Wrapped In A Towel appears as nice as Heating Pad something is missing. I just can’t put my finger on it but this is a bit more, I don’t know, dramatic and definitely more immediate, a little colder too, but Ziploc Bag of Ice Cubes Wrapped In A Towel does still seem to care as much for me as Heating Pad so I’ll take it. I haven’t been much for having a girlfriend in quite some time so, to have two, in such a short period is certainly … well … something.
And I can’t be mad at Mimi the Quirky. She was just looking for company, something more than my simple lap could provide, and Heating Pad was on the rebound. Who hasn’t been there?
I also have a friend who owns a couple of smoke shops here in the area, he records his radio spots with me. They feature all the latest smoke shop type hemp infused stuff with initials and ominous names, “Release the Kratom!” None of that is my gig but he was kind enough to give me a cream … Peppermint tinged. It’s like I just left a pizza joint that imagines itself something more and grabbed a mint out of their seeming fancy wicker basket on my way out, only on my back.
But I will say it has worked better than Icy/Hot and hey, I love pizza and if my back is high? Why the hell not?
Well, I have found a somewhat contorted “sit” spot that doesn’t hurt (finally) so I think I’m done. I’ve got NCIS waiting on demand, as long as FIOS doesn’t piss me off and charge me for it (fuckers) or it’s just the last episode of season one of “Messiah” on Netflix (fantastic so far by the way).
Little Bella eschews all this nonsense and simply hangs with her pal Space Heater, Mimi the Quirky continues her affair with my kinda ex and Cricket the Blind chooses the middle ground on comfy sheets.
Ok then. Ziploc Bag of Ice Cubes Wrapped In A Towel and I have a date. Here’s to hoping I don’t say the wrong thing again and she throws another melted drink on my pillow.
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