Hi and welcome to the Attic, I'm Frankenberry of said Blog Title and I write of just my everyday here, sometimes funny, sometimes heartfelt, sometimes angry, sometimes funny again because, well, who don't like funny, thoughts on getting older and sometimes stuff that's just kinda shit. I pen and sing the occasional parody tune and other songs, sometimes I even get a little bit poetic or short story-etic or something like that. If you're joining me here I thank you, but just mind your head and feet and keep an eye out for my little Bella and Cricket The Blind as well as the memories of Raspberry (Razzy), Mimi the Quirky, of Blink The Lil' Kit, Grayson the Mighty, Shoes the Big Orange, Shana-Girl, Benny Good Man Benny Brown, Merlin & Bob. Wouldn't want you step on them or anything … 'cause then I might just have to throw you down the stairs … damned humans.
Well it’s that time of year for this one again, an annual holiday tradition now for me to post it (if a third year running is enough to constitute “tradition”) if for no other reason, than, as a crazy cat lady guy, I just really like it.
Though I did include it recently in a post with a few other tunes, the fun song stories of my hapless friends Stevie and Tommy and Stevie’s not so hapless little brother Billy, this one needs it’s own singular post.
it’s fun, it’s catly and it’s Christmasy.
Nuff said.
It came from a Facebook post of a friend, Linda, a couple of years ago and her cat, Patrick, from a line of hers in that post that said, with him sitting in front of some Christmas pretty decorations, “It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick”
I went with it and had a blast.
Cheers Linda and to you Patrick, again, you damn good looking Christmas cat.
‘Tis the season Patrick.
It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Patrick
It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick
Everywhere Pat goes
Take a look in his snug cat bed laying his Patrick head
With maybe a mouse or two under his toes
.
It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick
Fur on every rug
Till the monster is need brought out
To suck away all hair’s clout
While Patrick runs no doubt
.
An extra can can of food or some cat nip for mood
Is his wish as any cat would
Ball with a bell and a knock it to hell
Is new wish across some hardwood
.
And Mom and Dad do funny dance to not step on cat’s pants
.
It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick
Everywhere Pat goes
.
There’s a tree that is soon to rise
Each branch a new cat prize
The hanging kind just waiting for a fall
.
It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick
Snoozing underneath
And what brings that slumber best
Are the lights not put to test
With Christmas cats now at rest
.
(break)
.
It’s beginning to look a lot like Patrick
Runnin’ cross the floor
To every cat’s Christmas dream
And the presents that will be
Box torn paper all a-skew
.
Sure it’s Patrick once more … time to puke, time to puke it’s Patrick’s time to puke.
Not much of a post here, no story, just another political parody in my long list of such, this one about what is at stake in this coming election.
Will it be continued democracy or a creeping fascism?
Shame on you GOP for your lack of will and your rubber backbones to not stand up for the former and just accept the latter instead now as a matter of course, as if this were just the flow of new history, the CPAC darling Jack Posobiec highlighting such in his future jackboot “Democracy needs to die” inspirational rant blueprinting all that is wrong with today’s GOP while of course somehow laying the blame of this wish at the feet of Dems and their destruction of OUR country “They say democracy, but they mean authoritarianism, and they know it,” he said with a straight projection face, the one where they are not allowed to assert their will and force us to bend to it. Can’t have that.
And Jack who are you by the way. I mean, should I know you? Are you a thing?
To Stealers Wheel “Stuck In The Middle With You”.
Stuck in Democracy’s Fight
Well don’t know which way we’ll head in this fight
So here at House Wiltse (my latest nom of this place – I’ve penned quite a few of them over the last 3+ years always imagining whichever one on a shingle hanging above the front porch) there are a couple or a few or a number of cats. That’s downstairs by the way. You are already well aware, I’m sure, of my upstairs couple or a few or a number of or a three now or a four twice or a five once or even the momentary more when I’ve made the mistake of leaving my door open while doing a load of clothes. But, like I said, there are a couple or a few or a number of cats downstairs and with that any number comes the occasional issue.
“Hey! Off the counter!”
“Hey! Don’t be swattin’!”
“Hey! I’m wearing a black sweatshirt and don’t have one those sticky rolly things!”
You just learn to roll with them and wear lighter colors.
This is small stuff though, small cat stuff you just navigate knowing that that it is part of the deal. But sometimes the “occasional issue” is one that is more than just a butt push to the floor or an admonishment to be nice or a back off from the sweatshirt you hairy hair hairy. Sometimes it’s an actual issue, like peeing where peeing shouldn’t happen. That’s what litter and its boxes are for right? Not necessarily it seems.
Celie (my landlady for those that don’t know or land-bestie as my friend Jonna likes to put it) texted me just a week or so ago that she had a song idea for me (you may have noticed I’ve been wont to a parody song or two) after one of the couple of or a few of or a number of cats downstairs decided to eschew the litter box and just go free rein, free pee rein.
Cujo.
Again.
She got the thought of the chorus of Shaggy’s “It Wasn’t Me” in her head just with a Cujo pee tint as he surely looked at her and cat said “what?”
I decided to go with that thought and some cat pee silly.
It Wasn’t Me, I Didn’t Pee
Yo, Handsome … Open up man
What do you want Cujo?
Mom just caught me
Seriously?
I don’t know how
Where?
In the shower, you know
Man
I don’t know what to do
Well, say it wasn’t you
—
Alright
—
Celie came in and she caught me red handed
Peeing on the shower floor
Picture this, I’m a cat named Cujo
Who doesn’t litter box no more
How could I forget that she lived
On this very big house floor
Just right down the hall here
Till she was standing at the bathroom door
—
How could you forget that Mom’s the one who owns this villa
She’s got sixth senses that snap up on her pilla
You keep this up she’s gonna be your killa
She knows it’s you even got ya on camera
Before you were dumb and strolled off into the shower
These humans got tech to catch you any hour
Yeah that’s video your ass up on stovetop
You gotta say it wasn’t you to save you from the next stop
—
But she caught me on the counter (It wasn’t me) Saw me peein’ on the stovetop (I didn’t pee) Even saw me in corners (It wasn’t me) Yeah she caught me on camera (I didn’t pee) Saw scratches on the floorboards (It wasn’t me) Smelled the smell that made her nose curl (I didn’t pee) Heard her screams when she discovered (It wasn’t me) I couldn’t stay so I took off
—
Celie came in and she caught me red handed
Peeing on the shower floor
Picture this, I’m a cat named Cujo
Who doesn’t litter box no more
How could I forget that she lived
On this very big house floor
Just right down the hall here
Till she was standing at the bathroom door
—
Act like nothing happened, that it’s no big deal
Walk your Cujo walk, denial in your cool
See if you can sing another cat’s fault song
Maybe Sunny with who you don’t get along
You’re gonna be banished from house for real
You’ll be pushin’ daisies soon for just this deal
You’ll be out garage, house life won’t last
Get caught again and 9th life will pass
—
But she caught me on the counter (It wasn’t me) Saw me peein’ on the stovetop (I didn’t pee) Even saw me in corners (It wasn’t me) Yeah she caught me on camera (I didn’t pee) Saw scratches on the floorboards (It wasn’t me) Smelled the smell that made her nose curl (I didn’t pee) I heard the screams when she discovered (It wasn’t me) I couldn’t stay so I took off
—
Celie came in and she caught me red handed
Peeing on the shower floor
Picture this, I’m a cat named Cujo
Who doesn’t litter box no more
How could I forget that she lived
On this very big house floor
Just right down the hall here
Till she was standing at the bathroom door
—
Gonna blame some other
For the smell that I’ve caused
Gotta be some other cat who goes and pees against doors
I will tell her that maybe it’s because of the dogs
Hi and welcome to the Attic, I'm Frankenberry of said Blog Title and I write of just my everyday here, sometimes funny, sometimes heartfelt, sometimes angry, sometimes funny again because, well, who don't like funny, thoughts on getting older and sometimes stuff that's just kinda shit. I pen and sing the occasional parody tune and other songs, sometimes I even get a little bit poetic or short story-etic or something like that. If you're joining me here I thank you, but just mind your head and feet and keep an eye out for my little Bella and Cricket The Blind as well as the memories of Raspberry (Razzy), Mimi the Quirky, of Blink The Lil' Kit, Grayson the Mighty, Shoes the Big Orange, Shana-Girl, Benny Good Man Benny Brown, Merlin & Bob. Wouldn't want you step on them or anything ... 'cause then I might just have to throw you down the stairs ... damned humans.
Sundarbans,The sunderbans, Sundarban Tour, Sundarban Travel Guide, Mangrove Forest, UNESCO World Heritage Site, Royal Bengal Tiger, Tiger Sighting, Wildlife Photography, Bird Watching, Sundarban Safari, Houseboat Tour, Ecotourism, Adventure Travel, West Bengal Tourism, Bangladesh Tourism, People of Sundarbans, Local Culture, Bonbibi, Mowal, Honey Collector, Sundarban Legends, Mangrove Ecosystem, Conservation, Climate Change, Biodiversity, Sundari Tree, Sundarban Itinerary, Travel to Sundarbans, Kolkata to Sundarbans, Sundarban Boat Trip, Wildlife in Sundarbans, Saltwater Crocodile, Spotted Deer, Indian Python, King Cobra, Sundarban National Park, Sundarban Tiger Reserve, Bay of Bengal, River Cruise, Nature Photography, Forest Life.
A personal exploration of autism from a brother’s perspective, including family relationships, philosophy, neuroscience, mental health history and ethics