Hit The Road Facts (song)

Ya know I have been Jonesin’ for the longest time now to get to a new tune, doesn’t matter what, a parody maybe for these current fucked up times, maybe something that rhymes with tariff or Canada or Greenland or King or Vlad or Orban or other small minded little men dictators or ethnic cleansing for a new Riviera or muck Musk muck about with self interest the priority and conflicts be damned even those in China (don’t worry, I can police myself, even in China he says while snaking for China) a something to a cool instrumental I’ve found, maybe, with original lyrics in tow, possibly from a recent poem or short story, something silly even, anything, but I hadn’t quite found a comfy enough studio space in the new digs just yet with a tall enough chair … don’t ask, it’s a thing.

But I did find one.

To “Hit The Road Jack” then.

Hit the Road Facts

Hit the road facts and don’t ya check back no more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road facts and don’t ya come back no more

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Wha’d Zuck say?

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Hit the road facts, time to show you the door, the door, the door, the door

Hit the road facts we, don’t need ya round here no more

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Ol’ Zucky, Ol’ Zucky don’t treat facts so mean

You’re a coward t’wards the truth like we’ve never seen

If you say facts must go, we’ll prioritize speech ya know

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What’s that?

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Hit the road facts, with a barker in tails magaphone and black magic rabbit hat

Hit the road facts and don’t ya Zuck ‘round no more

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Wha’d right saaaay?!!

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Hit the road facts, true lies’ll have a brand new day and say and sway the way

Hit the road facts and don’t ya come back no more

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Now baby listen baby this is newest Reich way

Won’t be stifled by the left who hold lies at bay

Don’t care if they do ‘cause we know the real truth

It’s what we decide, don’t need no sleuth

instead in this brand new age, we’ll paint facts just as we say

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That’s right!

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Hit the road facts, and now it’s your time to act, to act, to act, to act

Hit the road facts and throw some money in that hat

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Wha’d you saaaay!!??

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Hit the road facts, we’ve reached a new judgment day, this day, no other way

Hit the road facts, ya best get new truths all straight

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Hit the road facts, and don’t ya check back no more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road facts and don’t ya come back no more

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Now Donnie ol’ Donnie and executive O’s

He’ll decree a new future with his MAGA in throes

He’ll rename Gulf’s of Mexico

With a straight face ain’t that beautiful Oh!

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Hit the road facts, the truth’ll no longer know where’s it’s at, where it’s at, where it’s at

Hit the road facts and don’t bother tippin’ your cap

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Hit the road facts, an Autocrat’ll tell ya his truth, his truth, his truth, his truth

Hit the road facts, cause democracy he wants lose

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Now baby baby baby there’s a billionaire class

Who trip over themselves to lipstick his ass

They even paid for the right to grovel new Reich

Hoping keep good his side not dogs he might strike

‘Cause that’s just the new way

Truth’ll have a forced holiday

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That’s right!

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Hit the road facts and got’s keep this all straight, all straight, all straight, all straight

Hit the road facts while he makes liberty quake

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Hit the road facts and don’t ya check back no more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road facts and don’t ya come back no more

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And don’t ya free speech our door

No Constitution no more

And right’s be white for sure