Unintended Friends?

So, I stopped at Panera earlier today for a breakfast sandwich on my way to work. When I pulled in there were just a couple of cars kind of randomly parked in the middle portion of spots, 24 total, 6 on 6 in one section and 6 on 6 in another with more on either end of this middle.

I parked, away from the other two cars and made my way in, joining just those other couple of folks, ordered and waited.

While I waited, checking some news headlines on my phone which I should NOT have done, especially not on an empty stomach as, if you’re going to wretch, food is a waaaaay better wretch than bile, another few folks came in and then my order was ready and I made my way back out to the lot, the middle portion of the lot, that one that has the 24 parking spaces, only two of which were occupied, as I said, when I pulled in.

When I got to my car though, Lilly, who is not in any need of new car pals?

Ok, so here’s the thing, person who arrived after me, and also parked in the center portion of this Panera’s parking lot with those 24 almost all unoccupied spots?

I don’t care if you didn’t get enough hugs from your mother when you were a child, that maybe you didn’t have a lot of friends and the ones you did have were a little standoffish because you were a bit too needy or that maybe you were the one that was always picked last for whatever team game was at hand.

It is not my job, via my car, in an almost empty parking lot to be the one to help you compensate for that loneliness.

AND, WTF?!

You pulled in so our driver’s doors were adjacent to each other??!! I mean, you willingly chose to park so close that you would have to almost squeeze out of your car like liquid?!

Hey, my car is not your surrogate friend and I don’t need to be dragged into whatever issues you have that you’ve been harboring, possibly crying yourself to sleep at night with, since childhood.

AND you made me have to squeeze INTO my car like liquid as well and, in my advancing years, I have acquired that cliché’d spare tire that I really need to do something about, maybe come Spring I tell myself, I’ll start walking again I tell myself, as I am not as thin and liquid as I used to be and though I appreciate the reminder and that maybe you were just trying to give me a little unintentional nudge, I had just read some news headlines on an empty stomach and was in no mood for your needy/possibly well intentioned shit.

Park too close to your therapist’s car in your therapist’s lot Ok?!

Leave me the fuck out of your issues while at Panera!

You know, I should probably pick up some new walking shoes/sneaks though, Spring IS almost here.